10 Tips to get along with your introverted partner.

Taken from The Introvert Advantage: How to Thrive in an Extrovert World, by Marti Olsen Laney, Psy.D.

Dating an introverted partner can be difficult. Needs differ, and it is hard to feel understood and to understand each other. To better communicate with your partner try any of the following:

1. Make a date when to talk. This will give your introverted partner more time to get their thoughts together.

2. Don't interrupt. It takes extra energy to get back on point after an interruption.

3. Introverts have good memories so think before you speak.

4. Rephrase what your partner said. This will meet his/her need for validation and defenses will lower.

5. Take turns talking. Your partner may have something to say even if she/he appears patient.

6. Try parallel play. An introvert will want your company, just not a lot of engagement.

7. Have a soft approach when you convene after a work day. Allow space and time for your partner to process the day with you.

8. Writing a note or letter may be powerful. A thoughtful post-it or card will make a substantial impact. The introvert can take in the information without feeling overwhelmed.

9. Express appreciation for the time and energy your partner gives to the relationship knowing that it takes a lot out of him/her.

10. Switch between non-verbal and verbal communication.


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